Dear Fuston,
The first time she spoke to me rudely was the day I told her to drop her second date and only concentrate on me.
She took it to mean that I am selfish and actually never wanted her happiness.
We have been good friends for an upward of four years. We met in the university in my final year, while she was then in her second year.
We have been having it all rosy since then and have been enjoying the warmth of each other ever since we became friends.
She is very outspoken and can bare her mind on any issue without fear or favour, I love her because she is the dream of every man.
I have the intention to marry her but I have not been handy financially to execute this onerous task and it seems I am losing her because of this singular money issue.
It is not as if she demands money from me but she kept telling me that she can’t afford to keep her eggs in one basket.
She has insisted I should come and marry her officially and that would be the only reason for her to stop the relationship with this second guy who hails from Okirika here in Rivers State, but resides in Lagos.
I became very troubled in my spirit recently when she came and informed me that she will be visiting Lagos at the request of this guy.
If she loves me, like she has made me to believe, why would she keep another relationship?
Is she right to have told me that she can’t afford to keep her eggs in one basket? When I have assured her over and over again of my resolve to love her now and always.
I want to know from you what I can do to urgently make her concentrate on me alone, pending the time I will raise funds to marry her.
Thanks
Worried Joel from Port Harcourt.
Dear Joel,
You are lucky to have had a girl that will come to you and bare her mind on an issue like this, others may have engaged in such double dating secretly.
I said you are lucky because by her act of informing you, your mind is being prepared and you can device means of handling the information.
She is not right by involving herself in another relationship if she claims to love you. A bond is developed when two people are truly in love and this is enough to keep your friend concentrate on you, instead of looking elsewhere for love.
I am thinking she is becoming bored with your promises of marriage, women often love men that match their words with action and often disparages one when they discover his promises are usually empty.
Probably, this could be her reason for saying that she can’t put her eggs in one basket.
Four years is enough for you to prove your mettle as a man intending to hook up with a woman in marriage.
Your girl friend may not have seen serious actions coming from you regarding marriage, and that is why she tells you to face that she can only stop her second date only when you marry her officially.
She has thrown a challenge at you, marry me and I will stick to you only, it behooves you to prove that you can surmount this challenge.
You don’t need the whole money in the world to marry a woman, don’t you have a job? Start from somewhere, make her understand that you can conquer the financial involvement in marriage by doing something no matter how little.
In this case, reassurance by words of mouth are not enough, she wants to see you act, so act now and stop procrastinating.
Further procrastination on this may see you lose this girl you love to marry.
I wish you the best, happy weekend.
