Dear Bro Fuston,
It is always nice to read your column in Nigeria Newspoint every Friday, for me it’s a tonic for the weekend.
I am a student and a native of Sagbama (SALGA) in Bayelsa state.
I am a fun seeking beautiful girl in her early 23 years and I have a man from Ikwerre in the neighbouring Rivers State who is ever ready to spoil me with fun.
He loves me so much and can do anything to make me keep smiling for him; he is rich and is always eager to spend his money on me.
Since two years we started dating, he has been the one funding my education, and sincerely I am the envy of the other girls in school.
He has been begging me to marry him and my father has supported him to marry me, but I don’t want to get married now till I finish school and get a job that will keep me on my feet.
Apart from finishing from school, I like him but can’t boldly walk with him on the streets because he is pot bellied and far older than me with about 21 years.
If not for the age difference and the sluggish way he makes love to me, I don’t think there is any other thing about him I don’t like.
He is humorous and generous and this has kept me thinking.
What I want to find out from you is, if his lazy way of love making and in particular his age can pose troubles for me in future.
Thanks in anticipation for your urgent reply
Ekeremor in Bayelsa
Dear Ekeremor,
It is glaring that what you love about this man is the cash he generously throws at you. Obviously you don’t like him for who he is but for what he is worth financially.
Marriage is not dependent on riches or poverty, so any foundation of marriage built around riches or poverty is bound to fail.
You said it all, when you can’t proudly walk on the streets with the man you want to have as your husband what is the need continuing to date him?
Tell yourself the truth. Will you be able to come close to this man if he becomes poor today and stops funding your education and equally stops providing your material needs?
You are not doing yourself any good by sexually engaging with a man that is not your husband. It doesn’t portray you as decent girl from an exemplary home.
Age matters nothing because a man is as old as he thinks and a woman is as old as the way she looks.
You are only expected to shore up your thinking to that of a 44 year old and the man expected to bring down his thinking to that of a 23 year old girl, because marriage makes you two mates.
So, bear in mind that age matters little or nothing in the issue of sex, you can achieve satisfaction through several ways, only employ the services of a sexologist to enhance your marital sex life and before long you will be singing the praise of your man, likewise a man will sing the praise of his woman.
Always remember that sex is allowed only in the union called marriage.
Thanks for heeding to the voice of reasoning. Have a blissful weekend.
