Dear Bro. Fuston,
I don’t know who, or where to run to. It’s like the world is collapsing on top of me. The people I so trusted sold me out, and as it is, I have no where to go.
My father in-law was my greatest comfort, but he is no more, likewise my mother in-law.
My husband goes to church, not often, so I joined him in this attitude, there is no man of God that can assist me now because I don’t know any, and I cannot run to my mother because my findings show that she is the architect of my woes.
I find in you sir, a deliverer and my only source to acquire happiness, since you offered yourself to help those with troubled relationships without knowing who they are. The tale of my agony is lengthy but I will try to make it accommodate the space you have.
I got married at the age of 23 years in 2001, but I have been unfortunate not to have been blessed with child. I have gone with my hubby to the best hospitals in Europe, America and here in Nigeria, all we receive are assurances that we will have a child because we are both fertile to bear children.
The psychological effect of this alone can make one run into the market naked or commit suicide, but I have been carrying on.
For years, we relied on the best we can get from medical sciences, until recently I started attending some church-organized programmes for women seeking the fruit of the womb.
My childless condition is the bane of my sufferings and annoyance, I can hardly sleep. My husband has not bemoaned this condition, you know men, sometimes they hide away their unhappiness and secretly get involved in stupid act.
The reason for my saying this is because my younger sister is coming too close to my husband, and he has not done anything to stop her.
I realized that my own mother is the one prodding her to seduce my husband in order to have a baby for him, since it is believed that age is telling on me, and I may end up being pushed out of the house for another woman, a total stranger to take over my position. My mother’s reason for her action is because she wouldn’t want to loose the help my rich husband provides for her. I am writing this letter in tears, I am shattered, not knowing what to do. I wish I can just take a cup of water and become pregnant for my husband, only to save the shame and heart break my situation is about to cause me. How can I share the same man with my own sister as master-minded by my own biological mother? I want to wake up from this dream now. Please wake me up.
Cynthia in Owerri.
Dear Cynthia,
I want you to know that God’s thoughts are higher than the thoughts of men. Childlessness, though a very painful experience, is not beyond God who knows the reason for every situation, and can also surmount all manner of situations or challenges, no matter how long or big.
Some individuals think that age is having its toll on you, and for this, you may not bear children. That is their thoughts; it is not God’s thought, so cheer up.
I am happy that you have made appreciable efforts to break loose from the grip of childlessness since you got married. The doctors said, according to you, that you and your husband are capable of bearing children, yet none has come. Why then can’t you wait patiently on God? After all, it is the same God that gives children and does that at his own pace, and not at anybody’s pace.
Stop lamenting and seek non-stop, the face of God, trust in Him only and do not for any reason, put your trust in the arm of flesh.
It is unfortunate that a mother will encourage her daughter to destroy the marriage of her other daughter because of selfish gain; It is quite absurd and despicable, but you must also realize that your mother should not be trusted due to the fact that she is human and is bound to make mistakes.
Don’t also think that your husband is infallible and therefore you can hit your head on a brick and commit suicide, because he allows your younger sister close to him. Also bear in mind that it takes one that has been enveloped totally by the spirit of God to turn down such overture.
Don’t fold your arms and wait for someone else to solve this problem for. Communication, especially in marriage is very vital, speak to your hubby about the indecent closeness you have noticed between him and your sister, make him understand that it is capable of breaking your home. You should also make him understand that you are not the cause of the absence of children in your home, try and turn his face solely to God through any good preacher, because knowledge of God’s word concerning marriage and childlessness must be understood, if not, wrong ideas may prevail.
Your mother and your sister must be spoken to, let them know their act of selfishness is wickedness to you and therefore, they should desist from their plot to wickedly destroy your marriage of many years.
Let me correct an impression, that your sister is making moves to edge you out of your marriage is not enough reason to say that all men will accept being hooked into seductive act.
Once more, I urge you to pray enough, a child must come if you pray fervently. Stop crying to man; rather cry to God like Hannah did. It is well.
